[x]

Freedom of SilenceI really am okay
I just look this way
Far off into the distance like there is something there
But all that is there is silence
From me
So you think something is wrong
I am not as chipper as I used to be
But life is not as exciting
I exist
And somehow find myself talking of the dark side
Just poking my feet in
The cold blast
Is invigorating
Black can be beautiful
In people and in places
Without the night there would be no stars
I am aware
When I need to be
I know that you are talking to me
But do you know
That I am talking right back
I have not lost my voice
Or the right to free speech
I just do not feel fre

Drug MeI am in a medicated haze.
My eyes glaze.
I am not paying attention to what you are saying.
Do not blame me.
I am this way for some sort of reason.
I have labels.
I am a jelly jar.
I play on a par with you.
I miss the manic days.
Oh! How I do!
Jumping on the bed and out of airplanes.
I had my parachute.
Don't you worry.
I am in a hurry to get nothing done.
My brain is full of jam. Or it could be jelly.
And so is my belly.
I should move more often.
But my hands remain by my sides.
I clench them in fists,
Not for fighting.
Just because I am stiff.
From all of the drugs.
Slugs. Tugs. Lugs. Bugs. Billions of worms.

My Heart....Six HaikusYou have stolen mine
You are the thief in the night
You said those four words

The ones I thrive on
The words that spell out beauty
I love you and forever

But it has ended
Forever came much too soon
You have left my side

I still think of you
And wonder where you are now
How you are feeling

I have to stop soon
You belong to another
Just as I do too

It came with a cost
Of which we each could not pay
Too high for us both

The ButterflyShe has long fiery hair
And dimpled constellations
On her ivory cheeks
She goes about the day as any other
She shops
She stops to smell the flowers
And she eats whatever is there
But on the inside she is just a whisper
Removed from humanity
She is in a dark black box
Destitution is keeping her there
And she despairs
She tries kicking herself free
But constraints are tethered to her feet
She hates being isolated
But the black box is of her own making
She cries an ocean of tears
Salty reminders that she is still here
She doesn't know how to change herself inside
Where she will reside in darkness
If she can't pull herself

Going...Going...GoneI would be myself for you
But even that I fuck up
I don't know where to place my hands
They shake at my sides
My feet are rocks
Dead weight
Not made for walking out the door
I am betrayed by my own mind
It is the kind that makes too many mistakes
And I should learn
But I don't
I should've kept a hold onto my heart
At least then it would be safe
You have gone
And the fault is mine
You don't have to tell me so
I already know
Just like I know I am not good enough
Life will become rough
I should thank you kindly
For keeping this up
So long
That is my last line to you
So long
Farewell my friend
I guess we

You Are Alone But Not LonelyI have nothing to compare you to
And that nothing has ended a long while ago
I am not even sure I am saying it right
I cannot compare you to the moon
It shines too bright
And you have lost your luster
I wonder if it is me that you would rather lose
To be forever free of my madness
I know this ride is not easy for you
Neither is it for me
I am decimated
Procreated from a million nightmares
Hellishly dividing my thoughts
I would rather do things the right way
With the napkin softly folded in my lap
And the fork and spoon in their proper places
Instead of endlessly being wrong
I have things I need to say
But I do not think y

I Don't Know What To SayI am not the aborted
Though sometimes I wonder how and why I am alive
I have sought out death many times
This time is no different
I am dead inside
Just like countless others
I have read all of your poems
They are dark and demented
Just as I am
And I hide behind a clown smile
It is stretched out and paltry
The paint is dry
You may walk in now
But do not talk of the way that I stare
I know it freaks you out
I can lie by omission
This is what I can do to the very best of my ambition
I am my own rival
And I will fight until the finish
But how does one fight oneself
That is a good question
You start by stepping on

I WishTruly I do love
The passion inside of you
I wish it was mine

My HeartGive it back
It is not yours to keep
You have your own
You don't need mine as well
Just tear it out
You can use a scalpel
Cut in precise lines
Watch that you don't get blood on yourself
I have my own tendons and cartilage
I can piece it back together
Someway
Somehow
I will have to
I never should have given it away
But I say that now
Because you are gone
And even though I love you
I don't really like you right now
I'm glad you are not in my sight
We would have a fight
You don't like confrontations
You like smooth transitions
Well I am a thunder cloud
Crashing inside of your head
Hear the roar
Feel t

Just One KissI am a zygote
Formed from two but born to be one
You can see my twisted symmetry
I am the unborn
I know nothing of the economy
Or where to put my coat
I float in my habitat
Waiting on answers from my quest
There is resistance
And it is feral
I have been where you are
And I do not want to be there again
Life on the outside is brutal
It is plagued by sin and unhappiness
But I only wish to see the sun
The marvelous round glowing globe
I have no eyes to see with
I could only feel its warmth
I know what it is to be inside this body
Where blood flows
And bones grow
And tendons and ligaments stretch
I am love at a cellu

These DaysThese days roll on by
I try to go for the ride
But I am stuck here

A slave to my mind
Wondering where it will go
I live in the deep dark black

I lack a conscience
But I feel guilty as hell
Stepping off the path

The next day begins
With variables
I try to do what is right

I want to give smiles
To those stuck in slavery
I hope for one back

My DA FamilyYou know me the best
We are more than merely friends
You are family

Only The LonelyI am the desert
And you are my mirage
My eyes are dry
Rain becomes my tears
My heat is sultry
Reaching out my hands to touch you
I only grab air
Stale air
Where you should be
You dissipate
I create you in my mind
You have dark hair with gray at the temples
Your eyes look golden in the sunlight
They are brown
And trustworthy
If only you could be my reality
I wish that I could wish you into existence
But I am only a lonely desert

Be MineI feel you deep inside of me
With your words
You touch
Me
And I cannot forget the way
You hold onto my heart
You say that we are twin souls
Apart but still one
You are my sun
A shining ray
Warming my body and spirit
I am blank
Waiting for you to write elegance
Upon me
Take me with you
Higher and still yet higher
Until we surpass the sky and sea
And we fall down upon our knees
In gratefulness
Be mine
My love
Be my eternity

LifeJust because I will
Make the changes where needed
Is true evidence

That I do believe
In the contradictory
As fate would have it

It is what it is
Just as I am what I am
Neither this nor that

Unconditional
Love is experimental
Truth is hard to find

Because you bend it
And twist until it is found
Beneath the tatters

Of an unwritten
Line of magic palmistry
Only death can wait

For a nice reprieve
A willing recipient
Of an endless fate

Life is what matters
So go on and live with it
You will anyway

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More from ~chewyraezen

Freedom....Seven HaikusShe severed the link
It was a bad connection
Too full of static

He did not like her
But there was fascination
In her soft full lips

He had to love her
It was just the way it was
Always in conversation

Her name was brought up
It was the same as his
They shared a cup of coffee

Across many miles
And through the dusty cities
He could not reach her

He tried with a line
Much too little and too late
He could not keep her

She searched for freedom
Brought it to her ample breast
And liked it to no other

Your SmileStay just for a while
So that I can see your smile
You are beautiful

The Shining SoulDo not be afraid
The storm is about to rage
It is deep within

You can find it there
Embedded in your dark soul
Slipped away of might

The day becomes night
And you find yourself alone
Loneliness is there

And you bare your soul
Guardians come from the stars
Their light is so bright

They come just for you
The heavens are now closer
You can reach for it

Grasp the next rainbow
It will show you how to dance
And resist the dark

Be a soul that speaks
The truth of wonder and light
The storm is over

You finally are through
Delivered of depression
You can feel the light

It is eternal
To go from the wrong to right
No

Beyond LooksAesthetics are fine
If your mind is not lazy
And your will returns.

Not A Single ThingNothing is sacred.
The past is gone and buried,
And memories lie.

See MeCan you see through me?
I need classification.
I feel like a ghost.

What do your eyes say?
Do they see a ghostly haunt,
Or some such being?

I want to be me.
Please say that you can see it,
An apparition.

I have no other
To give me validity.
Please say that you can.

I walk through these halls
Looking back at my reflection.
I see dirty glass.

Fingerprint faces
Staring right through my essence:
Clarification.

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Your Guardian Angel

by ~chewyraezen, Oct 4, 2012, 5:27:03 PM
Literature / Poetry / General Poetry / Free Verse

She became a part of Orion's belt
A diamond in the night sky
It was her time to die
But she was not afraid
Because she knew she would live again
As a celestial wonder
She is not gone from this earth
Her soul can fly
She may visit you if you want
Not as a haunt
But as a winged creature
If you say a special prayer
And turn yourself around and around
Until you become dizzy
Then you will see her
When your vision becomes blurry
She will be the shadow in the room
She is your guardian angel
Watching over you
So that when you become depressed
And reach for a blade
She will stop you
You can hear her flutters if you try
It sounds like a sigh
Don't ever worry because she is there for you